DISCLAIMER relating to yesterday's blog:

It should be noted that yesterday's blog was only half accurate, half mildly inaccurate and half utter nonsense. Today's blog is a full third more or less accurate. DW would like me to inform you that her representation in yesterday's blog did in no way resemble her, either living or dead, and that no animal other than myself was hurt in the making of yesterday's blog. She would also like me to state that the opinions expressed therein were my own and complete crap. Finally, she would like it to be known that she did not, in point of fact, finish her bacon on the day referred to in yesterday's blog.

Ok, so maybe I did exaggerate a little. Who cares? My version was funny, unlike the painful and unhappy truth. Actually, DW was extrememly worried and looked after me very well and made sure I was as ok as I could be under the circumstances. I guess she must like me or something.

So let me tell you about our little "mattress hunting expedition". Because I had incapacitated myself on Sunday, we had to cram in all our planned activities in to Monday, which was a public holiday. Our activities were quite simple and few, but when I say "cram", I mean we didn't have a babysitter so Princess and Little Man had to come along.

Princess isn't the best shopper when it comes to mattresses. For one thing, her method of testing isn't what most store owners would consider... allowed. To her, the beds are set up perfectly as little bouncy islands that can be leapt between and parents and store owners will chase you like crocodiles. This makes testing a bed in the usually way pretty much impossible. It is difficult to relax and get a sense of the comfort zoning of the springs and the posture conturing and support while listening to the boing, boing, boing and the very tense voice of the sales assistant saying. "Isn't she cute with the jumping and the boots and the mud..."

The reason for the mattress hunting is because we are "doing up" our bedroom. I say "we" and "our" because I am involved financially and I sleep in the room. To be fair, I also acknowledge that DW has a much better sense of decor than I do and I have willingly relinquished control of the "upgrade" to her. The thing with being a "stay at home" mum is that you are also a "stay at work" mum. I don't mean that you work all the time, as some mothers who shall remain nameless but often appear on "Oprah", would have us all believe. That may be true for some mothers but not so in our house. The problem isn't that "stay at home" mums work from the moment they get up to the moment they go to sleep. The problem is that they are "at work" from the moment they rise until the moment they go to sleep. Its the being trapped at home that is the hard thing.

For me, home is the haven I retire to after work. I use "haven" in the sense of stepping into nice warm room containing a hurricane. DW doesn't have that same sense of haven. Actually, nobody has that same sense of haven. So we are trying to make our bedroom a little something special, our own quiet space, away from the "haven". DW deserves that.

And so we hunt for beds and mattresses and bedside tables and pictures and other stuff needed to make a bedroom pretty. DW asks my opinion of all sorts of things and then says "are you just saying that?" to which I reply, "Of course I'm just saying that. Do you think I'm an idiot?"

"You could at least pretend that you're interested."

"I was!"

You see, the problem is that we have slightly different taste. For instance, DW would like a great big picture of a flower on the wall. The wall would also be excellent for a great big plasma screen. I have also explained to DW that with a great big plasma screen, we could still have a picture of a flower on the wall, only we could also have other flowers, maybe a sunset scene or a beach or even the footy. But she just wants the one flower and its cheaper as a print than a plasma screen. Besides, I don't watch that much footy anyway. Still, you know, a plasma screen.

Anyway, whwn all is said and done, the plan DW has come up with for the room is actually very nice. It has a lot of charm without being all girly and pink, not that being girly and pink has any inherent charm. I'm quite enjoying our little project together and I do get to have my input but I also know that the main need for this space is for DW and so I'll do my best to make it what she needs. Besides, as she is fond of pointing out, I'm so vague we could be living in a box and I wouldn't notice as long as it had broadband and a laptop. I think she underestimates the importance I place on a toilet. Anyway, when the room is all done and pretty, I'll post a picture with a blog, no doubt telling of my suffering and agony, tongue in cheek.

Ciao!

Thought for the Day: Don't walk on the Wild Side. Do the Chicken Dance. That'll get you noticed.