Friday, June 09, 2006

Good news! A quick search on Google today yielded a new hit for my new word. Ok, it was my blog entry from earlier in the week, but now the word is out there, so I hope you are all doing you bit. I’ve even got Princess saying it, though she uses it much the way someone else might use the word “smurf”. But that’s ok. Little Man just gives a great big smile when he hears the word, though he does exactly the same thing when someone says “smurf”. He has never seen a smurf and Princess thinks of them as “the little cold people”. Anyway, keep up the good work, unless you haven’t actually done anything yet (that includes DW! – where’s the support, I ask you?), then you had better get started. Anyway, on to more important matters, though I don’t suppose there is actually anything more important. Let’s just say, on to other matters.

I am the boss. And by that I mean my boss is on leave and has left me in charge of the whole group. Ok, the last thing he said was “don’t touch anything and don’t speak to anyone, and for God’s sake, don’t answer my phone.” I said to him, “Are you sure I’m acting manager?” and he said, “Of course you are.” So there you have it. I’m in charge. It’s a scary thought. Actually, there is only one other person in my group and he doesn’t actually report to me per se. And there is another guy who drops in once a week to sit in the boss’ chair. Also, I’m not allowed to go to the group meetings. But its all experience, and money can’t buy that. I also have to take a slight pay cut, so I guess it could be argued that I am paying for it, if you want to be negative.

So, what do I plan to do with my newfound power? Well, I’ve always wanted to take over the world. Yesterday, I created a new word and today I am in charge of… well, precisely what I am not sure as it wasn’t really explained and I have no actual control over staff, funding, equipment or lighting, but I like to think it’s a start. So how does someone take over the world? Firstly, I’d just like to stress that I do not advocate violence as a means to world domination. It may be effective but it just isn’t my way. As DW will attest, I am more likely to resort to tickling to get my way, but clearly that will not be practical. Anyway, most people don’t like me touching them. Just ask anyone on the train. They don’t know my name but they can point.

I also considered using my super-powers, but decided that would be unfair and it’s better to keep them a secret anyway, so that I can use them to defend my world once I have it in my control. I like to call it “an ace up my sleeve”, though that itself is not one of the super-powers, just a simple playing card.

Just as I created a word, so shall I take over the world. Yes, I shall achieve world domination by blogging! I know what you are thinking: “I was going to help this idiot with his stupid word thing and now he wants what?!?” Ok, let’s not jump off the bandwagon too soon. Not point being too hasty. At least koberish stands a slim chance. I know taking over the world is a long shot but no one in the whole of human or insect history has EVER tried to take over the world by blogging, and just think how grateful I’d be to those loyal followers who helped me create a word. Actually, I should point out that Koberish is not actually intended to be a religion, in case you were worried about being brainwashed by a great spiritual leader.

At my right hand shall sit Princess, who will probably act as spokesperson. And at my left hand shall sit Little Man, no doubt grinning his head off. Let’s call him “morale officer”. And I shall sit on DW’s lap and she shall drink water from a glass whenever I speak.

So it is written, so shall it be. Well, maybe. Probably not.

Ciao!

Thought for the day: Cat’s stare at me like they know what I’m thinking.

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